***RETAIL GIANT TEAMS UP WITH
BREAST THEMED FAMILY RESTAURANT***
***PROTESTORS IN PIG MASKS KICKING UP A STINK***
On Saturday, October 23, Marks & Spencer's flagship store on Oxford Street will be visited by protestors wearing pig masks and distributing leaflets publicising the retail giant's decision to sublet one of its buildings to be used for a Hooters breast-themed family restaurant.
Says Percy: "I am confused. What have Marks & Spencer done wrong? I know we have a Gold Standard ethical policy but we draw the line at sexism and see no place for this to be a concern for us.
“I am an integral part of a Marks & Spencer's Plan A Gold Standard ethical policy, but my calm domain is shattered by the actions of a bunch of crazed activists in pig masks. All because Marks & Spencer have sublet premises in Bristol to this chain of American themed eateries. The only thing wrong with Hooters seems to be that they uphold Neanderthal views and employment practices concerning the role of women in society and in the workplace.”
However, crusading Miss Piggy retorted: "Marks & Spencer should acknowledge their responsibilities, not only in their retail policies, but in the effects of their business decisions. Hooters’ attitudes to women has no place in a modern society. Hooters is a shabby and aggressive example of misogyny, with which I, even as a mere pig, will have no truck. Shame on Marks and Spencer."
Piglet, Babe and The Three Little Pigs are, of course, too young to be allowed on the premises after 9pm, but issued this joint statement: "Percy and his masters at M&S have done us pigs a great disservice. No pig would wish to be seen dead (whether as pork or otherwise) in Hooters - no pig that is, apart from the sexist pigs who we confidently predict will attend the breastaurant."
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